Girls Trip is the Best Medicine

Girls Trip is the Best Medicine

We’re going to be staying up late, drinking, making memories that we can laugh about for the rest of our lives, because that’s what a girls trip is for.”

-Dina aka Tiffany Haddish “Girls Trip”

Yes hunny I couldn’t stay it any better. I am coming back from a bomb ass trip ! Excuse my language but I have to be really honest about how I am feeling. I just got back from Washington DC… the nations capitol. This trip was one of the best experience that I had so far.  Now I did not get a chance to check out the monuments and all the others stuff but I had a another chance to bond with my girls… my sister ! #tripsandrisk

IMG_0827We have been traveling together for a few years. Greek picnics, Atlanta, Toronto… and now DC. I really needed this trip because  I was really burnt out at work. The same thing everyday is so tiresome and you really start to lose it…. lose your sanity and the essence that make you a fun person. I really looked back at my life and I am like I really not enjoying it like I should. I am 28 years old and I can’t say that I really did anything ! So yes DC trip with so super fun ! We were out there living are best lives. Getting ready to go the hottest clubs, take long needed naps, eating great food, and just bonding. people can’t say they have that with woman.

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Girls Trip is Self Care..

Have you just taken a good look at your life? We as  black women have so much going on.. either we are packing lunch, planning launch… and pattin’ weave ( like Amanda Seales said). Literally we focus so much time on other people and things and none on ourselves. So with that being said let hit the road with your most closest friends. Research shows that hanging with you girlfriends can help increase your overall health and well being. You get a chance to relax, and lose a little control in a good way.  Girlfriends are good for the kid !

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Stigma of a Girls Trip..

Being around women in a car for more than 4 hours can be too much for some women. Is it really a lot of drama. I can say I was conflicted about girls trips but it definitely has been perfected over the years. Spending times with these women more than 4 hours and being in close quarter you really get to known them even more. So its really good experience. I believe you get the right people together, learn each other, and communicate effectively you have an awesome girls trip.  Think about making fun memories and experiences is medicine. I love talking about the trips and the things we done after the fact. It literally make me feel so good. These are things that I can cherish for the rest of my life!

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Why Girls Trip are Needed?

Judgment Free Zone: You get the right girls to hang out with no one really cares about what you do or the random guy you kissed the other night. As long as your safe and you accounted for that all that matters. So it judgement free zone.

Well needed relaxation: When I’m on a trip with the girls I feel like I am not getting any rest because it literally long night every time. However I catching up on being relax and calm. While they are napping I am catching up on reading, or just mental stability.

Talk about Guys: Open forum about guys are so much fun ! Like we feel comfortable opening talking about guys, their shenanigans, if they good in the sheets or not… etc!

Honesty Box: You can open about what going in you life. Express feelings with women who know the struggles. You are free to be honest and vulnerable

 


On the Fashion Tip

My Favorite Looks on the Trip

2 days of Slaying with the same sandals !

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First Look: Rebdolls Red 2 piece set

This was my first two piece set I ever had and its in red. OMG I gave salsa mami in this picture. I love this piece so much because it was daring. Also this set took me out my comfort zone. The material alone was very nice and thick.

Always Winning Skirt// Rebdolls LINK

Aways Winning Crop Top//Rebdolls LINK

First of Rebdolls comes thru with the looks and the set. I love the fact that the sets you can buy separately. The way my body is set up I am smaller and the top and heavier at the bottom. So I need a smaller size at the top. Also you can mix match different pieces.

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Second Look: Forever21 Tank Dress

I literally have this dress in 3 others colors. This dress makes my life so complete. You can dress it up or down. This dress does my hourglass frame justice. Also having a little black dress is essential to put in you bad when going on trips.

Black Bodycon Tank Dress// Forever21 – LINK

Thank you forever for this dress!! Keep them coming in more colors!


 

So with all that being said check up on yourself. Evaluate what going on in your life and take some time for traveling. Traveling is self care ! We all need time to get away from our surroundings. Get with your closest friends that are loyal and set up some time and place and payment plan.

When is your next road trip and where are you going ?

I want to know so let me know below in the comments.

Thank you so much for reading.

push forward.

Alayna

All That Color… Its April !

All That Color… Its April !

Wow its the day after Easter. Can you believe it was Easter Sunday, April Fools Day, and rent is due all at the same time. Wow !! Last month went my way I can say. I was organize and I noticed how many things I say that accomplish. I learn that accountability is important when it comes to being a blogger and just real life stuff ! So yes,  I knocked all my personal goals out the park last month and I am excited to keep this momentum going in April.  In April Sexual Assault Awareness Month, this something we really need to focus on. Also make sure we address with all women and men, especially with our women of color. So its definitely going to be address on the blog. Lastly the fashun.. oh how I love fashion. I want to take it a step further on with my look.

Fashion Note

My wardrobe consist of denim jeans, graphic tees, black jeggings, and dresses!  Thats really it, my staples to my everyday looks. However I still feel like I am dressing like Alayna the college student. It is time to grow. Again, I keep stressing how much I want to grow up when it comes to fashion. So that is the plan is to grow up. I still want to be myself however just advance my look. On the flip side, I was flipping through the April 2018 InStyle magazine, and I came across a spread about mixing some of the hottest hues caught on the fashion runways. Omg I was so inspired ! So yes we are bring all that color to blog! For the month of a April yes we are still keeping the focus on spring fashion. However I am intrigued by vibrant colors, and a utilitarian look.

Blog Note

For the blog this month I am in the giving spirit. April is the month for paying it forward. so yes I want to offer a few things to you sis (my reader).  So stay tuned on my blog and social media accounts. I guarantee you will see a giveaway,  and a few freebies! On another good note I excite to say that I finally got a chance to collaborate with an awesome brand. I can’t wait to show what I am working on.

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Personal Note/ Goals

On a personal note last month went really well for me. I clean up my room and put a lot of things back in order for myself. I completed my fasting and even lost a little weight. YAY !!

  1. Finish reading “The Hate U Give” . Very awesome novel
  2. Gain more self awareness for my actions and what I say
  3. Face my fear. I am getting my wisdom teeth remove the 1st of May. I am so scared !
  4. Consistency on the blog. Stick to my schedule!
  5. Continue drinking 64oz of water daily
  6. Enhance my look

So let makes this month great sis!

push forward.

Alayna

My Body Image Gives Me The Blues Sometimes! How to deal ?

My Body Image Gives Me The Blues Sometimes! How to deal ?

Dealing with body struggles is a tough thing to swallow. It something that everybody has dealt with throughout or some point of their lives. I can really be tough on my body at times. Wishing my stomach was flatter, I wish I didn’t have dimples on my butt, or stretch marks. Wishing my skin was more clearer or my teeth brighter.  All those things that keep me obsessing.

Here come the school stories. I was called “butter ball” in middle school. Also I was the thick girl in high school. Yeah some guys actually called me big mama! Really ! You already know that having meat on your bones was rarely celebrate or in style.  Then I had a bad love triangle thing in college… all the way wrong! So yes the anxiety set in and your trying to do anything and everything to fit in what the world says is normal. Little do you know your now on the road of body image struggles.

Over time I learn to love my body but I don’t love it all time. I can be somewhat critical of myself, and that really gives me the blues something.  How do I deal with my body struggles ?

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The way I looked at my body struggles came from a number of things. Bad breakups, being teased, a lot of negative things that shaped how I feel and see my body. It really hard being a woman trying to find her place in world with it different standards on body image, and beauty. Its hard as hell ! I know a number of us have one or handful things that they want to change about our appearance. So how do we cope with this? How do we not get completly disgusted with our bodies ?

How to Improve Your Body Image ?

  1. Stop being so mean to yourself . We can be our worst critic! Have you noticed that you can list the negative things faster than the positive things. So listen and become more aware to what you are saying to yourself. Remember that no one on this earth is perfect . So if you see yourself being negative… Stop it ! Say I am “fine as hell”! I say  lol that but really give yourself a positive compliment !
  2. Learn and accept your body. I learn to love my body when I started my blog. I become a blogger specifically to improve how I seen and felt about my body. Getting in front of the camera. Taking risk with certain outfit really change how I viewed myself. I started taking more pride in myself
  3. Positive affirmations. Every morning I tell myself how much I love me ! Especially in the mirror. Something I stand in front of the mirror naked and I just give myself positive affirmation shower. I shower myself with self love.
  4. List what your love about yourself. I love to think about this. Every once in awhile I have to remind myself because I get the blues. So I listen all the things I love about me. I love my butt, or my smile! Or how funny I am ! All those things matter.
  5. Get a massage!
  6. Nourish your body. Feed your body right. I never claim to be a fitness guru or anything like that. However I notice when I eat right and really nourish my body I feel good. My image on my body is not distorted based off how I feel. When I feel good internally my image of my body looks good too

“Don’t let your mind bully your body”.

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Sis you are worthy!

Self Worth is key to battling  your negative body image. You are worthy!  What is self worth ? Well the way I understand self worth is being deserving of good things. You are worthy of good health, happiness, success, or whatever you see fit to make you happy. In order to do something about how your perceive body you first have to re-evaluate your worth. If you do not tackle this  or understand how worthy you are you will undermine everything step you take to improve your body image. So work at consistently.  I preach this all the time, take time and learn yourself. Ask yourself serious question about you, what make you tick, what you love ? Accept the good,  bad , and the ugly. Self Love. Have compassion and I think you are on the right path in improving your self worth.


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On The Fashion Tip

Omg this look paired with this location just all came together so beautifully.  I chose to do a classic look for the spring time. My views on my body change so much over time, I love showing off my curves and even my stomach. Look at the belly button peeping through lol. I got this whole outfit….. Give you time to guess!! If you a frequent reader you already know how much I love Forever 21. SO yes the whole outfit is from Forever. I decided to do a classic look however it had a few twist. Normal classic look is consider a nice pair plain denim jeans with a button down woven shirt. Classy right ! I had to push to agenda. Yes a blue and white stripped woven shirt  with twisted hem set the outfit off right. I wore this shirt out and I got a lot of compliments on it and really becoming on the belly.  Now the denim. Spring always bring out the classic denim looks however, my denim are always distressed. I love distressed jeans because of  that extra edginess I need to bring to my look. Lastly to keep this look clean, sharpe , and edgy I had to add my all time favorite sneakers into the mix. Low Top White Converse ! This shoe alone can make a lot of outfits complete !

 Check out the links below to get this look in your closet !  

This whole outfit is less than 110 bucks!

Plus Size Blue & White Stripped Woven Twist Hem Shirt//Forever21// Shop |Similar

Plus Size Distressed Skinny Ankle Jeans// Forever21// Shop

White Converse Chuck Taylor All Star Low Top// Journeys// Shop

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With all that being said sis it never to late to change the way you view your body. Your body is unique and it yours so get out of your own way and love on you. Remember you are worthy and that is the key to help arm yourself from your negative views of your body image. You got the tools so work on this daily. I am right with you sis. No more blues !

push forward.

Alayna

 

Location: Belle Isle Park | Detroit, MI

Photographer: Reem Eissa Photography

special shoutout to Reem. she is my new favorite photographer. omg shooting with her is amazing. the location alone was beautiful. i love shooting at the belle isle conservatory because you can get a different look every time.

IG: @reem.eissa.photo

FB:Reem Eissa Photography

 

We All Have to Hold Ourselves Accountable !

We All Have to Hold Ourselves Accountable !

5 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

Accountability: Calling yourself out !

Me: Alayna!

Myself: Huh lol 

Me: Yeah you.. come to the carpet ! We need to talk !

Myself: *sigh* Okay 

Accountability works the other way to you know. You can’t always hold others accountable for what they do… you have start look at yourself and what you do too.

Before I wrote out my goals for March I reflected on the month of February. I noticed that I did not reach any of my personal goals nor was I consistent on my blog. I was thinking and I was coming up with some many excuses as to why I did not achieve my goals or work on my blog enough ! None of it was making sense. As I was pointing  fingers at other things in regards to why I was not being consistent on my blog or reaching my goals… I had three fingers point back at me. It was on me !  I let myself down, I was being lazy, I was not using my time wisely . It was all on me! I had to hold myself accountable for  my actions and choices. Tough pill to swallow right . I realize that it time to take myself serious ! Stop sabotaging myself! I was the reason why my growth was stalling.

think late show GIF by The Late Show With Stephen Colbert
Credit: Giphy: The Late Show With Stephen Colbert

GETTING IN MY OWN WAY ! UMMM WELL IT TIME TO GET IT TOGETHER!

What does the phrase mean “holding yourself accountable” ?

Accountability alone is about holding something responsible. Personal responsibility is holding yourself responsible- not someone else.  I am learning that once you become more aware of yourself, and holding yourself accountable that you will  improve dramatically. So be proactive! You have to change your mindset! If you want something you have to go out there and get it. So if you want to flourish in life, start holding yourself accountable for what you do and say. Be more aware of your actions, responsibilities, and goals. (Those are three ways to hold yourself accountable) I have a understanding if I do this I will see a big improvement in my personal life, and professional life.

5 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

  1. Be in the right mindset:  I think if you want to hold yourself accountable that you need to be in a positive state of mind. I like creating goals after reading a book that put me in a good mood. So if I feel inspire then I feel compel to create and  do !
  2. Create a to-do list and honor it !: To hold yourself accountable you have to be a little organize. I prefer to create a to do list! The list has to be on me at all times and I have to actively cross things off. So yes write your goals, or what you want to accomplish on some paper.  Make it accessible and honer that list. Cross things off that accomplish.  Sidenote:  Do not start anything new until you knock the things you want to accomplish first!
  3. Spend your time wisely: Make sure you are using all your time dedicated to what you need to do ! Example: I lose out on  time because I am literally scrolling on Instagram. That could be time I am using to write out my blog post for the next day.  Oh man ! Yes you have become more aware of how you are using your time sis! Make it all count.
  4. Have a person that hold you accountable: Get you a buddy (real friend) that will help hold yourself  accountable. A friend that will make you aware of your actions, and what you are doing. Everybody has that one friend that wants to see them grow, so put them to use !
  5. Stop putting things off: A lot of times I put things off because I am scared. Scared of the outcome ! Fear is a b word. If something that you want to do set some goals and do it ! We all gotta do the work! There are no shortcuts in success !
late night lol GIF by The Rundown with Robin Thede
Credit: Giphy The Rundown with Robin Thede

Go out and be great ! Pull yourself on the carpet and hold your self accountable for your actions and choices, what your responsible for, and your personal goals. I want use to grow sis.

SIDENOTE: The fashion is coming yall !!! I have a couple photoshoots plan and done ! So keep rocking with me!

push foward

Alayna