So I know as of lately my emotions has been all over the place. I made it clear this month in my It’s October !! post that I wanted to focus on healing. Inside and out, especially mentally. So it is time to be still for a moment. Also, it time for me too really sit back to identify what is making me feel all of these emotions. With all that being said I had to identify that I was emotionally a mess. I had lost control….. one thing about a person like me losing control scares me. So this month I put myself under the microscope and really worked hard with getting to core of what my grief was. Check out my story to see if I am in the process of recovering from emotional pains and scars!
My Story …
First I constantly was worry, and complaining a lot. I was worry about being successful, money problem, just a lot of things that everyday people are challenge with. I was mental drained. Also I was suffering from the perfectionism complex. I felt like I had to be perfect. I really can feel the pressure I put on myself. All my family and friends looking at me, using me as the model. I put so much pressure on myself to the point I stated to rebel. My rebellious state put me in the worst predicament ever in my life. I was force to make some hard decisions during that time. After coming though that tough time, I found myself ridden with some much guilt, shame, and sadness. I felt like a failure.. I was literally crying all the time. (At that point, I made the decision to talk to somebody… I talked to my mom, also I was in the process of finding a therapist) This was the first time I realize I was not on it. I made a huge mistake and I was not alright. I was so busy trying to be perfect that I believe that I could never make a mistake of that magnitude. I had to face reality that I was not perfect. I was not excused from making mistakes.
So with that being said I believe that GOD put me through it to learn that I was not perfect. I will make mistakes and just because I made of mistake does not make unworthy of love. He understand that all his children are human, and we all make mistake. I had learned to stop condemning myself . In order to heal you have to first self examine, ask for forgiveness and go on with life. Now I am not trying to take get to heavily spiritually, I wanted to share with you all my story on how I am learning how to heal myself emotionally. Honestly, this journey of healing is something I have to practice day by day. I truly understand that in order to heal I have to trust the process and learn to accept myself. Also, to stop being my worst enemy, and how to still love myself past all the mistakes that I made and will make in life. Let me be clear … I am still healing and I will probably be healing for a while however, for the first time I don’t feel like I have to be perfect !
Identify Emotional Pain
Emotional pain can really make it hard for anyone to live their best life. It really can take a hold of you and really cause a mess. I think it is important to try to identify it however, emotional pain can be hard to identify in my opinion. I realize on my own that I was holding to a lot of grief from my past. Even some close friends told me that I needed let go of thing that was “life span” ago. Seriously, it was a lot of things were on my shoulders. It was really wearing away at me. That type of pain can really hinder anyone from living their life and manifest some terrible things physically. I know for me I continue to replay the past. I kept thinking about my issues over and over, those thought only made me more sad, and piled on more grief. So with that being said I am tired physically of carrying all this stuff around. So I had to really practice the art of “letting go“.
Tips for Healing Emotionally
- let go of all the baggage that you carrying. it’s too heavy
- forgiveness is key
- accept who you are and make peace with yourself
- stop ruminating – stop harboring over the hurt, past, and the grief
- speaking positivity really helps – self affirmations
- turn lemons into lemonade – turn your failure into something positive
Importantly: Remember if you need to talk to therapist to hep you navigate be all means put this post down and do what you need to do to start the healing process
Other ways to help mental wellness…
- I am optimist, my mommy taught me how to look on the bright side of things. I have faith and hope that I am always going to make it through anything that is challenging, thankful I do !
- Supportive people in your corner
- Expressing gratitude: Having a gratitude journal has being really helping me. Every night I write down what I am thankful for. I go to bed with joy in my heart, and really helps with putting all my things into perspective
- Mindfulness: Presently and actively appreciating were you are at in life.
Disclaimer: I want to make it clear and I am not licences individual or therapist. These are just my personal thoughts.Importantly: Remember if you need to talk to therapist to help you navigate through it all; Pleas put this post down and do what you need to do to start your healing process.
Resources: Psychology Today: www.psychologytoday.com – has a whole list of therapist, and social workers in your area that you can reach out to for help). Therapy for Black Girls: www.therapyforblackgirls.com– has a list of black therapists in your area.
“Until you heal the wounds of your past, you are going to bleed. You are going to bleed. You can bandage the bleeding with food, with alcohol, with drugs, with work, with cigarettes, with sex; But eventually, it will all ooze through and stain your life. You must find the strength to open the words, Stick your hands inside, pull out the core of the pain that is holding you in your past, the memories and make peace with them. “
Special shout to Daniela. She is one of the sweetest person I every met. She is so honest and I really appreciate people like her. We literally had a whole conversation while taking these pictures. I really appreciate and love days like this.
Location: Nicole & Daniela Studio
Why I was inspired…
I love to tell my story because I feel like it can ignite the fire in someone to do something about what they are going through. It was really important for me to get my smile back so I turn my grief into a post to help myself, to learn, and to hopefully help someone else. I hope this find you well
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