Story Time: Why I Was Inspired to Start Blogging?

Story Time: Why I Was Inspired to Start Blogging?

I felt compelled today to tell my story as to why I started blogging. I mention it a bit in about me page my blog. However, I never fully went into to details about. I feel comfortable at this time to tell my story. Disclaimer: I have to be really honest with how my brain process things at time. Ha, you might not like the fact that  I started with superficial dreams.  But it is my truth at that time. Hopefully this story will find you and give you to the courage to go for what you want in life. Motivation is the key ! There is always something that spark the flame within you to go for something.

So before I started blogging I was really unsure of myself and not really sure where I fit in the world. Struggling always to find my voice. On top of that all I had a low self-esteem. I would mask my tears and sadness with jokes, laughter, and priding myself on being the class clown. I always wanted everybody to like to me… I wanted to be popular. Let me remind you this was only a few years ago. I was totally confused.  On the flip side, I really did not have sense of style in my opinion. I grew up during that time wear Akadmiks, Pepe, Baby Phat “urban” street wear was in style.  I was mixing trend, wearing outdated things… simply a mess.  Don’t judge… if you are millennial you already know the early 2000s was something else lol !

Shocked Franchesca Ramsey GIF by chescaleigh

So how did I get myself together, First I had to let go of a few things that were hindering me in my past. Bad breakup, Bad friendships and embrace new endeavors.  I had to let go my feelings towards the worst relationship crisis and friendship during my freshman year of college. If you want to read the full story check out my beautifully broken post .  After that horrible experience a few other bad ones I learn that I have to love myself first before I can be in any relationships. So I started focusing on me. I started to take more pride in my appearance and how I valued myself over the time I had to myself.  I started dressing up more, wearing more makeup and trying different styles out. I felt I needed to look the part. I ask my mom for her guidance and I got really into People StyleWatch magazine. By that time I graduated from college and I  was working as intern in Downtown Detroit.  A girl at work got me really hooked on interest. I was creating boards and liking pictures left and right.  I knew at work it was dress free environment but I wanted to step my game up further. I wanted to prove to people, that just because I was a curvy girl does not mean I did not know how to dress that was false.

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One day while I was on Pinterest I stumble across Kelly Augustine picture. Kelly is plus size blogger/ influencer.  She was so bold and regal in her picture. Kelly Augustine, then it grew to Essie Golden, Osha Waiters, Hayet Rida, GabiFresh, Naturally Fashionable … the list can go on and on.  I was super inspired.  They  were so confident and that want I wanted to be was confident.  Forgot the clothes I wanted the confidences that beamed off of them.  So in 2015 I got the nerve up to start FashionLayn.  And the rest is history !

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I started showcasing different fashion style however it was hard staying consistent at first. Then I transition into providing a positive message to curvy women. Now I am all into curvy fashion, speaking to millennial, and show off my city, Detroit. I absolutely love to blog and talking to you all like a real life girlfriend! Over the 3 years of blogging I have grown and overcome many obstacles along the way. I super proud with where I am now with my blogging. I am super excited to see how far this go for me !

So the answer to my question, I was inspired to start my blog because I wanted  confidences for myself. I wanted the confidences like all those curvy girls I shared in this story. It is still a real up and down story. I wouldn’t be me if I said I had it all together. I chose to share it with yall! Go for what you want and don’t let anybody tell you it’s not possible.  Be Confident This is my dream and currently living it ! 

letitia wright black girl magic GIF by Republic Records

Special shoutout to BlogWithKim Mastermind Class who inspired me and others to share their story.

cassandra

DROPPIN’ GEMS: Doubt Kills Dreams

DROPPIN’ GEMS: Doubt Kills Dreams

Have you heard the phrase… “Doubt kills more dream than failure ever will” ? Yeah I came across this quote on Pinterest and it really got me thinking about self doubt and how easy we can fall to it. Doubt can make you lack confidence in your abilities to accomplish something.  It hold you back from doing great things.  We all were given potential to do something great with our lives. However we still doubt ourselves.

Why do you doubt ourselves in the first place ?

  1. Fear that we can’t sustain.
  2. Habitual doubter – It’s habit – sidenote: it take 21 days to break a habit.
  3. We lack the skills or the experiences
  4. Not putting the past behind us
  5. We believe what others day
  6. Surround by people who doubt themselves
  7. Comfort Zone/ Complacent

All these things can make you doubt yourself. Doubt your potential and then it can kill your dream ! So listen we do not have time for the dream killing or the dream killers. Doubt definitely kills dreams more than failure. Doubt will have you thinking all negative thought on why something can not happen for you. Listen: Believe in yourself… Im going to say it again. Believe in yourself. You can do anything that you put your mind. That might sound cliche but it the truth.

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How do we stop doubting ourselves

  1. Stay inspired: No matter if you truly believe in what your doing you have to have that little push to keep us going. So do what you have to do to keep you inspire to keep going. Literally it inspiration everywhere you just need to receptive to it.
  2. Stop comparing yourself: I think I have said these few times in different post but you have stop comparing yourself to others and what they are doing. I know it hard because you want to be great too. However time has it on agenda for you. You make yourself feel inadequate.
  3. Be aware when you are being your worst critic: I think you are selling yourself short when you over criticized
  4. Postive affirmations: I like to read positive and motivational quotes to keep in the right head space when I am feeling down.

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“Self Doubt is the anchor that keeps our ships from sailing”.

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On the Fashion Tip:

I feel like I am bring a spring denim look to the table. Of course you already know I have an addiction to graphic tees. It just so me ! Denim can be done anyway. This is a simply everyday look. Why did get this WOMAN graphic tees? Simply I got it because I am woman.

Shop My Look:

Plus “Woman” Graphic Tee// Boohoo – LINK

Special Thanks:

JORDVN X RYVN (Jordan), a Detroit Photographer, who took these amazing photos of me. His work is beautiful and he capture the moment so lovely. Thanks again

Instagram: @hecutsa|Facebook: Jordan X RYVN

Location: Royal Oak, Michigan

So my dearest readers and myself believe in yourself and your dream. Doubt kills dream and we don’t have time for it. Your dream matters. So stop doubting yourself and believe in that dream and make it a reality !

push forward. chase the dream.

Alayna

Beautifully Broken

Beautifully Broken

FashionLayn Collaborates with BnPowered

BnPowered is motivational movement that inspire a person to be empower by their own personal life, journey, or story. We all have a experience something in our lives that have shape how we are today. Let me say everything that I experience in life has not always been good. I learn over the years how to cope with my bad experiences, and to take power over them and flip my negatives into positives. No I will not be defined by those bad times.

I am so honor to collaborate with Brit Lashae from BnPowered. When black girlS link up we create magic ! First, Brit Lashae is a beautiful black women who use her story, took control of her narrative, and just like her name she is teaches us all how to BnPowered ( be empowered) !  So awesome right yes! I could not say no to this. I am always in search for motivation. Brit Lashae is a survivor , a personal trainer, author, a motivational speaker, and of course the founder BnPowered movement. I am so glad to be apart of the movement!

BnPowered.com

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I was broken ! However I changed my narrative. I would not be define by negativity!

My “Beautifully Broken ” Story

I had a relationship go all the way wrong while I was in my freshman year of college. So I met this guy through my best friend. I fell in love with the guy because he was so kind to everyone despite all he had going on. We dated for two years, and that was my first big relationship. Anywho when I went up to college I remember we decided to break up–honestly I don’t remember why but we did. I can remember that I still was in love with him and I still wanted to be with him badly. Here is the twist, my roommate at the time was a sweet girl. I would consider at the time one of my good friends and I was so happy to have her with me during college. However it all change.  Now remember the guy I was with for 2 years he visit me a few times up and school, thinking he was trying get back with me he only had eyes for my roommate….. Long story short all he wanted was her! They were together right in my face. A real life couple. My roommate and the guy I feel so in love with ! I became the third wheel. I though she was my friend, and thought he had loyalty to me.

What did I do… I tried to deal with, stay in my quiet, until I blew up on them both. This situation left me so broken. I could not believe this would happen to me. I lost my self esteem. I lost my confidences. I lost myself. I was so broken during this time, mind you I had a full load of classes ! It is sad to say it really took me a few years to get myself together. I felt like I would never be find love from man ever. Honestly it took a long time to even get back in the dating scene. So many fail attempts because I was trying to find something to replace that void in my heart.

Eventually, I pick up all the broken pieces and mended myself back together. I prayed, and meditated. I learn that I am worthy of love. Also, I learn to appreciate the experiences. Yes it was a bad experiences but I learn something out of it I am love. Self Love that I needed to have for myself. I needed to love and value myself more. I would not be define by the two that hurt me so.

“We all have broken pieces, but they are Beautifully Broken pieces that are part of the journey.”

-Brit Lashae

Read Brit Lashae story and how she was inspired to create this shirt ! (Read More)

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Shop My Look :

“Beautifully Broken” T-Shirt /// BnPowered  LINK

Plus Size Super Skinny Ankle Jeans// Forever21 LINK

Black “Old Skool” Vans// Journeys LINK

shop her other inspirational and affordable wear!

Shop BnPowered Collections

Special Thanks:

Special shoutout to BnPowered for collaborating with me ! It really warms my heart when I get a chance to collaborate with a black owned business.  Thank you so much hunny! Congrats on your 1 Year anniversary for BnPowered!! Keep flourishing !

Bnpowerd: Instagram @BnPowered | Facebook | BnPowered.com

 

So what are you going to do with your broken pieces ?

push forward.

We All Have to Hold Ourselves Accountable !

We All Have to Hold Ourselves Accountable !

5 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

Accountability: Calling yourself out !

Me: Alayna!

Myself: Huh lol 

Me: Yeah you.. come to the carpet ! We need to talk !

Myself: *sigh* Okay 

Accountability works the other way to you know. You can’t always hold others accountable for what they do… you have start look at yourself and what you do too.

Before I wrote out my goals for March I reflected on the month of February. I noticed that I did not reach any of my personal goals nor was I consistent on my blog. I was thinking and I was coming up with some many excuses as to why I did not achieve my goals or work on my blog enough ! None of it was making sense. As I was pointing  fingers at other things in regards to why I was not being consistent on my blog or reaching my goals… I had three fingers point back at me. It was on me !  I let myself down, I was being lazy, I was not using my time wisely . It was all on me! I had to hold myself accountable for  my actions and choices. Tough pill to swallow right . I realize that it time to take myself serious ! Stop sabotaging myself! I was the reason why my growth was stalling.

think late show GIF by The Late Show With Stephen Colbert
Credit: Giphy: The Late Show With Stephen Colbert

GETTING IN MY OWN WAY ! UMMM WELL IT TIME TO GET IT TOGETHER!

What does the phrase mean “holding yourself accountable” ?

Accountability alone is about holding something responsible. Personal responsibility is holding yourself responsible- not someone else.  I am learning that once you become more aware of yourself, and holding yourself accountable that you will  improve dramatically. So be proactive! You have to change your mindset! If you want something you have to go out there and get it. So if you want to flourish in life, start holding yourself accountable for what you do and say. Be more aware of your actions, responsibilities, and goals. (Those are three ways to hold yourself accountable) I have a understanding if I do this I will see a big improvement in my personal life, and professional life.

5 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

  1. Be in the right mindset:  I think if you want to hold yourself accountable that you need to be in a positive state of mind. I like creating goals after reading a book that put me in a good mood. So if I feel inspire then I feel compel to create and  do !
  2. Create a to-do list and honor it !: To hold yourself accountable you have to be a little organize. I prefer to create a to do list! The list has to be on me at all times and I have to actively cross things off. So yes write your goals, or what you want to accomplish on some paper.  Make it accessible and honer that list. Cross things off that accomplish.  Sidenote:  Do not start anything new until you knock the things you want to accomplish first!
  3. Spend your time wisely: Make sure you are using all your time dedicated to what you need to do ! Example: I lose out on  time because I am literally scrolling on Instagram. That could be time I am using to write out my blog post for the next day.  Oh man ! Yes you have become more aware of how you are using your time sis! Make it all count.
  4. Have a person that hold you accountable: Get you a buddy (real friend) that will help hold yourself  accountable. A friend that will make you aware of your actions, and what you are doing. Everybody has that one friend that wants to see them grow, so put them to use !
  5. Stop putting things off: A lot of times I put things off because I am scared. Scared of the outcome ! Fear is a b word. If something that you want to do set some goals and do it ! We all gotta do the work! There are no shortcuts in success !
late night lol GIF by The Rundown with Robin Thede
Credit: Giphy The Rundown with Robin Thede

Go out and be great ! Pull yourself on the carpet and hold your self accountable for your actions and choices, what your responsible for, and your personal goals. I want use to grow sis.

SIDENOTE: The fashion is coming yall !!! I have a couple photoshoots plan and done ! So keep rocking with me!

push foward

Alayna