Hey good people. Happy Valentines Day! How you feeling? I know I feeling good, just showing myself with some extra love today.
Now, I would never thought I would still be a single woman. I had my life mapped out so differently, mmkay! I knew for sure I was going to be married by 25 so forth and so forth. Well I am off my so call plan for 5 years. I am 30 years old and I am single. Prefect combination, right?! Surprisingly, I feel okay about. I am riding the wave. Just continuing on with my life. On today’s post I am sharing my personal thoughts on my single life and dating as a millennial.Also, I am going to tell you why I think I am still single! Let’s go.
The Single Life
So, I am single like $1 dollar bill, okay. If you would have told me that I would be going on decade as a single woman, chilllleeee I would not believe you. “Welp believe it, sis.” I am 30 and there are no new prospects or no dating what so ever. (Lol, well I do have a crush on someone.) However, if I heard wedding bells every time I had a crush……. lol well you catch what I’m saying.
Being Single Bad Reputation
Anyway, I just celebrate my 30th birthday in January. I know that there is a big stigma when it comes to being 30 and single. Hmm you’re probably thinking she is lonely, or what about kids? Well you thought wrong. I have embrace my single lie. I am okay with my relationship status. However, I think people put their insecurities off on single people. It is even worst when you get older. I feel some people are afraid of being alone, especially when they become older. Who says single folks are lonely?
Since my life is not consumed with partner, I use my time to focus on self. Self care, hanging with my friends, shopping, and blogging. I don’t use my time to be sad or miserable, so counterproductive. I enjoying my life just the way it is. To add, a sis is not ready for kids.
Praying For A Miracle
Yes I am enjoying my single life. However, you do have a lot of time on your hands looking at others’ relationship. And you think about it all the time. That the truth! It something you can’t get around it. We all want love. Yes, I have been on my knees praying to the Lord above to send me a miracle. I embrace my life for what it is. However, I would be lying through my teeth if I said I preferred being single.
I am thankful that my perception of being single change over the years/ decade. I use to believe in order to have meaning (especially as woman) to life you had to have husband and/ or children. If I thought the same way, well I would be quite depressed. However, life goes on. Until then I am going to do my part, and try to date…… I think!
Dating As Millennial
Whew ccjhhhilllle dating as a millennial is too much. We loose interest, then ghost each other. I not even sure if millennial truly value relationships anymore. Too many options, we look for perfection in everything, and we are jaded as hell.
I have tried dating, however it has been hard and sometime nonexistent. I even trying dating online. Online is just not for me I prefer to meet someone in public.
Lol I had to drive my date around on the first date. I have been on date that the person was so so sweet, however they ghost me. Well I have done some of the ghosting too, I am not a victim. To be frank, some people only were nice or liked me get at my body. Situationships or friends with benefits are the worst. I am too sensitive for it.
Overall I have not totally cancel out dating. Hmm maybe I will try the online thing again. Until then I am chilling!
Why I Think I Am Still Single?
Dating is hard but I have to take myself into account. I am not the prefect rose, or the damsel in distress. So why am I still single?
The infamous question “why you still single?” I have been asked this question so many times. I wish I collected a $1 every time, if I did I would be rich. It one out of ten thing I wish people would stop saying to single folks. If you want to see more click here.
I am single because I refuse to relax my standards. I know what I want and need. What is wrong with wanting a guy to have a job and can communicate. Stability and consistency is important to me. Over the course of decade, I learn to stop puting unrealistic exceptions on men. I don’t place unrealistic standards that I know I can’t achieve on someone else. It is just not fair. No matter how long it takes, single, I will not settle for less. However I might be able to compromise.
Another reason why I am single is because I don’t take the time to make myself available to date. My life is all about work, blogging, and hanging with friends. If I want to get out there, then I have to make myself available. Prince Charming won’t fall in my lap. This is not a fairy tale. If you want to talk more about prioritizing dating, let me know.
I choose to BE
I value my independence and I still learning about me. Maintaining a relationship is hard work, and at this point I am not sure if I ready to give up my time to another person. Some time is unwilling but now I chose to be single.
Detachment- Lose Interest fast
I can lose interest so fast. One minute I can be all end and the next thing I know I have lost interest. Did I mention I ghost people too? I know not cool at all. Too add to my singleness, I can be detached and emotionally unavailable. I made this way, and I more like this because I am afraid of getting hurt. It that risk you take that cause me to retreat. Relationships scare me bit.
This something that I have been working on for quite sometimes. Taking others people feelings and emotions into account. Also, not being afraid to show my emotions
Overall being single and 30 is not that bad. You have freedom to do things you always want to do before being restricted. This is the time I use to work on myself. Who says you have to be single, old, and miserable. I choose to be happy. Being single is just my life right now. I know I want be single for the rest of my life. To be honest, I want to be version of me when I meet that special person . Until then I am chilling and living my life to the fullest.
Location: Detroit, MI
What are your thoughts on being single? Why do you think “be single” has such a bag reputation?
Share with me in the comment section. Let’s talk about sis!! I hope February is an amazing month for you. If you have not check out my previous post about single life, you can so here.
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