The Importance of Female Camaraderie

The Importance of Female Camaraderie

The stereotype when women come together is that we are always divided.  Trying to find any reason to claw out each other eyes. I also heard that we don’t root for one another when other wins. As a black woman I know it all to well. It is a huge stigma against black women I know yall believe because you see  it all on TV.. reality TV tell women that we will rather see yall drag each other to make a quick buck.  Do I really need to name the shows… come on now you probably watching one of them right now ! I’m not going to lie to you sis I am guilty as charge. I keep up with the shows too. Women against women sells! However, in all honestly I am over it! I am over seeing women fighting each over men. Or women not rooting for one another because of their own insecurities. I simply over the jealously, and unhealthy competitiveness . Please do not get caught up in that nonsense.   We need to stand up for our sis. Have her back !  Be a true friend because it is hard out here trying to navigate these waters,  we need all the help we can get. So I teamed up with my favorite blogger and friend , Leah V  to express the importance of female friendship/camaraderie and female empowerment  with African inspired prints! We got some work to do, so lets start at the foundation .

What is female camaraderie ?

It is really another word for friendship!. Closeness and loyalty shared among a group of women. Yes ladies we need some loyalty,closeness and respect! I believe female camaraderie is an understanding between woman. That we all can come to the table and have respect for one another. Be able to deal with our differences, empathize, and empower one another.  That would be an outstanding girl code.  Friendship and kinship can never be replace and I believe that camaraderie is the foundation.
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Ways to Promote Female Camaraderie Wherever, Whenever, However !

Jealously needs to go! I know women have a tendency to compare themselves to next woman.  Guilty as charge: I have don’t it. Let be clear even the strongest woman in the room has doubt. It plaques us all but we need to be vigilante when we are doing this to ourselves. Jealous definitely taints our perspective. So with that being said we need stop the comparing and embrace what makes you.. you!  Build up your self esteem, set your goals, have tunnel vision, and celebrate your wins.

I need your support Another way to build female camaraderie is to support one another. Show up for your girl when she launching and brand. Hold her up when she is going through it. We need to support one another.

Something got ahold of you, Its the Past! Grudges between women can linger for along time. When women have a confrontation it really hard to repair those relationships. I believe in order to get past all the mess that we need to let go of what happen in the past. I really want women to try to find some common ground and some mutual respect.

Respect goes a long way With all that being said we have to have respect for one another. No matter how different we are we still have to respect and try to empathize with one another. It simple as that!

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Camaraderie is Important.

Simply having her back, being honest without the confrontation. “Were all in this together” mentality. I want women to win so I believe camaraderie is important because of the support/ console, mutual respect for one another, and identity. If we as women can create a solid foundation to stand on, the door can open for us all to have a seat at the table and have a conversation and try to figure it all out.  Respect goes a long way so lets put the right foot forward .

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Behind every successful woman is tribe of other successful women who have her back.

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A few of my favorite pictures from the shoot !

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Location: Midtown Detroit & Downtown Detroit (Cadillac Square)

Model: Leah Vernon- The creator of the Beauty and the Muse

Photographer: Nicole & Daniela Photography | Website: NicoleDanielaPhoto.com | IG: @Danielalisi & @Nicolegafa

i believe that camaraderie between unrelated women can win. what do you think ? 

let me know your thoughts below in the comments 

push forward.

cassandra

 

Life is Better with a Pineapple

Life is Better with a Pineapple

Enjoying the Simple Thing in Life

So here is the story and how I got to a happy place from a pineapple. So 5 days prior to all of this happiness in these pictures I learn that I only had few dollars left in my bank account. I was so hurt because I still needed to pay a couple a bills and the due date was right around the corner. I honestly did not know what to do. I called my mom crying on the phone because I knew I messed up ! I was having to much fun and  not watching my money. So my money was official “funny”.  I had to ask my parents for the money … Noooooo!!!  I hate asking my parents for money because I feel like I can’t handle my business without coming to them.  For the past few of days I have been counting  my money… making sure I don’t overdraft my account.  Anywho, I plan to get my financial back together. I been getting great tips for the Broke Millennial book. Also, I plan to create another savings account (nest egg). So when hard time hit I am not drastically impacted.  Let me get back to the story… SO I was so sad and felt down and out. I could not enjoy anything because I did not have the money to do so. No going to the bar, no eating out,  and no shopping . The consequences of my action.  This left me really SAD! Feel like a failure.  Like man I can keep my finances in check…

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After all that I got invited to event at The Artist Village Detroit. I use to go there a long time to ago when I was younger. Anyway I got invited by my blogger friend, Leah. I was trying to make the best of my situation. All the vendors and there items were so beautiful. Here comes the pineapple…. So I mustard up some money to get this Pineapple  smoothie drink that everybody was talking about from the Motor City Java & Teas House. I started not to get it…. like you don’t have any money to be giving away right now. I got it away. So I had this pineapple smoothie and it really made my day. The drink was delicious. At this point I was filled with so much joy. All in my spirit and heart.  Really how can a drink do it? This simple little pineapple made me feel so good. It was not just about the pineapple, the small pineapple brought  me to the conclusion that I can still enjoy my life. Yea  I am broke but money alone does not define my happiness. Money does make life easier but never can define your happiness. It is the simple things in life that we take for granted and don’t even realize it.  Being able to hang out with friends, walking, our sight…. the simple things.

So my point to this story is to enjoying the simple things in life.

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That simple little pineapple really did it for me. I totally forgot that I was flat broke, that I needed to get root canal, and all the others stuff that had me worrying. I forgot about the all the frustration that come along with adulthood. I enjoyed my life. I had so much fun that day with my friend.  Then we took pictures!!! A blast !!!! In all honesty you do not have to spend all of your money to have a good time. It really the simple things that bring us so much !  I believe that was the lesson that God is trying to get across to me.

slow down and enjoy the simple pleasures in life

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This little pineapple smoothie did it for me! I remember to be thankful and appreciate for the small things in life..

The little things definitely add up to big happiness.

 

Location: The Artist Village in Detroit

Photos: Take by Leah @lvernon2000 and Mia @miasatu

 

let me know in the comments below what are some of the simple pleasure in life you enjoy?

DROPPIN’ GEMS: Doubt Kills Dreams

DROPPIN’ GEMS: Doubt Kills Dreams

Have you heard the phrase… “Doubt kills more dream than failure ever will” ? Yeah I came across this quote on Pinterest and it really got me thinking about self doubt and how easy we can fall to it. Doubt can make you lack confidence in your abilities to accomplish something.  It hold you back from doing great things.  We all were given potential to do something great with our lives. However we still doubt ourselves.

Why do you doubt ourselves in the first place ?

  1. Fear that we can’t sustain.
  2. Habitual doubter – It’s habit – sidenote: it take 21 days to break a habit.
  3. We lack the skills or the experiences
  4. Not putting the past behind us
  5. We believe what others day
  6. Surround by people who doubt themselves
  7. Comfort Zone/ Complacent

All these things can make you doubt yourself. Doubt your potential and then it can kill your dream ! So listen we do not have time for the dream killing or the dream killers. Doubt definitely kills dreams more than failure. Doubt will have you thinking all negative thought on why something can not happen for you. Listen: Believe in yourself… Im going to say it again. Believe in yourself. You can do anything that you put your mind. That might sound cliche but it the truth.

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How do we stop doubting ourselves

  1. Stay inspired: No matter if you truly believe in what your doing you have to have that little push to keep us going. So do what you have to do to keep you inspire to keep going. Literally it inspiration everywhere you just need to receptive to it.
  2. Stop comparing yourself: I think I have said these few times in different post but you have stop comparing yourself to others and what they are doing. I know it hard because you want to be great too. However time has it on agenda for you. You make yourself feel inadequate.
  3. Be aware when you are being your worst critic: I think you are selling yourself short when you over criticized
  4. Postive affirmations: I like to read positive and motivational quotes to keep in the right head space when I am feeling down.

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“Self Doubt is the anchor that keeps our ships from sailing”.

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On the Fashion Tip:

I feel like I am bring a spring denim look to the table. Of course you already know I have an addiction to graphic tees. It just so me ! Denim can be done anyway. This is a simply everyday look. Why did get this WOMAN graphic tees? Simply I got it because I am woman.

Shop My Look:

Plus “Woman” Graphic Tee// Boohoo – LINK

Special Thanks:

JORDVN X RYVN (Jordan), a Detroit Photographer, who took these amazing photos of me. His work is beautiful and he capture the moment so lovely. Thanks again

Instagram: @hecutsa|Facebook: Jordan X RYVN

Location: Royal Oak, Michigan

So my dearest readers and myself believe in yourself and your dream. Doubt kills dream and we don’t have time for it. Your dream matters. So stop doubting yourself and believe in that dream and make it a reality !

push forward. chase the dream.

Alayna

We All Have to Hold Ourselves Accountable !

We All Have to Hold Ourselves Accountable !

5 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

Accountability: Calling yourself out !

Me: Alayna!

Myself: Huh lol 

Me: Yeah you.. come to the carpet ! We need to talk !

Myself: *sigh* Okay 

Accountability works the other way to you know. You can’t always hold others accountable for what they do… you have start look at yourself and what you do too.

Before I wrote out my goals for March I reflected on the month of February. I noticed that I did not reach any of my personal goals nor was I consistent on my blog. I was thinking and I was coming up with some many excuses as to why I did not achieve my goals or work on my blog enough ! None of it was making sense. As I was pointing  fingers at other things in regards to why I was not being consistent on my blog or reaching my goals… I had three fingers point back at me. It was on me !  I let myself down, I was being lazy, I was not using my time wisely . It was all on me! I had to hold myself accountable for  my actions and choices. Tough pill to swallow right . I realize that it time to take myself serious ! Stop sabotaging myself! I was the reason why my growth was stalling.

think late show GIF by The Late Show With Stephen Colbert
Credit: Giphy: The Late Show With Stephen Colbert

GETTING IN MY OWN WAY ! UMMM WELL IT TIME TO GET IT TOGETHER!

What does the phrase mean “holding yourself accountable” ?

Accountability alone is about holding something responsible. Personal responsibility is holding yourself responsible- not someone else.  I am learning that once you become more aware of yourself, and holding yourself accountable that you will  improve dramatically. So be proactive! You have to change your mindset! If you want something you have to go out there and get it. So if you want to flourish in life, start holding yourself accountable for what you do and say. Be more aware of your actions, responsibilities, and goals. (Those are three ways to hold yourself accountable) I have a understanding if I do this I will see a big improvement in my personal life, and professional life.

5 Ways to Hold Yourself Accountable

  1. Be in the right mindset:  I think if you want to hold yourself accountable that you need to be in a positive state of mind. I like creating goals after reading a book that put me in a good mood. So if I feel inspire then I feel compel to create and  do !
  2. Create a to-do list and honor it !: To hold yourself accountable you have to be a little organize. I prefer to create a to do list! The list has to be on me at all times and I have to actively cross things off. So yes write your goals, or what you want to accomplish on some paper.  Make it accessible and honer that list. Cross things off that accomplish.  Sidenote:  Do not start anything new until you knock the things you want to accomplish first!
  3. Spend your time wisely: Make sure you are using all your time dedicated to what you need to do ! Example: I lose out on  time because I am literally scrolling on Instagram. That could be time I am using to write out my blog post for the next day.  Oh man ! Yes you have become more aware of how you are using your time sis! Make it all count.
  4. Have a person that hold you accountable: Get you a buddy (real friend) that will help hold yourself  accountable. A friend that will make you aware of your actions, and what you are doing. Everybody has that one friend that wants to see them grow, so put them to use !
  5. Stop putting things off: A lot of times I put things off because I am scared. Scared of the outcome ! Fear is a b word. If something that you want to do set some goals and do it ! We all gotta do the work! There are no shortcuts in success !
late night lol GIF by The Rundown with Robin Thede
Credit: Giphy The Rundown with Robin Thede

Go out and be great ! Pull yourself on the carpet and hold your self accountable for your actions and choices, what your responsible for, and your personal goals. I want use to grow sis.

SIDENOTE: The fashion is coming yall !!! I have a couple photoshoots plan and done ! So keep rocking with me!

push foward

Alayna